01/05/2006
Mummy please don't be sad, I miss you so much too. It's beautiful here, but I worry a lot about you. I sleep with angels watching me... there is only love up here. I am never lonely or afraid because God is so very near. I walk with Jesus every day, He is very kind and loving. Don't worry Mum, He holds my hand when we cross a golden street. I never cry or hurt myself, I see Grandpa every day. I play and laugh and sing a lot and I hear you when you pray. Please Mummy, don't be mad at God, you see He loves me too. And even though you are not with me, I am really still with you.
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23/04/2006
Heavenly Garden God wanders around His garden And looks at all His flowers He looks after every one of them Some of which are ours. He feeds them and He nurtures them Every single bloom Then sometimes in a corner He finds a little room. That wont do He tells himself I'll put something there instead Then gets down on His hands and knees And makes a little bed. Then He takes a look below And examines every face And when He thinks a flower looks tired He takes it for that well earned place.
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16/04/2006
Dear Easter Bunny, I just had to write today To see if you'll stop in heaven As you hop along your way? You see, a part of me is up there That I miss with all my heart You see, my child is up in heaven and it's torn my life apart When you take the egg up there Please whisper in his ear Wish him Happy Easter As I wipe away my tear.
Author Unknown
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15/04/2006
Before You Went Away We only got to you hold you Just before you went away God took you to his angels Where we shall meet again one day We never heard your laughter Or wiped a teardrop from your eye We had no time time to get to know you Before we said goodbye Now everytime we see a raindrop Or a bright and shining star We can look toward the heavens For we know that's where you are While all the other angels Play with their new best friend We that are left keep crying Waiting for our pain to end Those left behind will love you Until each our dying day For we only got to hold you Just before you went away
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15/04/2006
When God calls little children To dwell with Him above, We mortals sometimes question The wisdom of his love, For no heartache compares with, The death of one small child, Who does so much to make our world, Seem so wonderful and mild. Perhaps God tires of calling The aged to His fold, So He picks a rosebud Before it can grow old. God knows how much we need them, And so he takes but few, To make the land of heaven More beautiful to view. Believing this is difficult Still somehow we must try, The saddest word mankind knows will always be Good~bye. So when a little child departs, We who are left behind Must realize God loves children, Angels are hard to find...
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15/04/2006
This was a life That had hardly begun No time to find Your place in the sun No time to do All you could have done But we loved you enough for a lifetime No time to enjoy The world and its wealth No time to take life Down off the shelf No time to sing The song of yourself Though you had enough love for a lifetime Those who live long Endure sadness and tears But you'll never suffer The sorrowing years No betrayal, no anger No hatred, no fears, Just love - only love - in your lifetime.
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11/04/2006
What makes a Mother I thought of you and closed my eyes And prayed to God today. I asked what makes a Mother And I know I heard him say. A Mother has a baby This we know is true.' But God, can you be a Mother When your baby's not with you? Yes, you can, He replied With confidence in His voice I give many women babies When they leave is not their choice. Some I send for a lifetime And others for a day. And some I send to feel your womb But there's no need to stay. I just don't understand this, God I want my baby here He took a breath and cleared His throat And then I saw a tear. I wish I could show you What your child is doing today. If you could see your child smile With other children and say: "We go to earth to learn our lessons Of love and life and fear. My Mummy loved me oh so much I got to come straight here. I feel so lucky to have a Mum Who had, so much love for me I learned my lesson very quickly My Mummy set me free. I miss my Mummy oh so much But I visit her each day. When she goes to sleep On her pillow's where I lay. I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek And whisper in her ear. "Mummy don't be sad today I'm your baby and I'm here." So you see my dear sweet one Your children are ok Your babies are here in My home And this is where they'll stay. They'll wait for you, with Me Until your lessons are all through. And on the day that you come home They'll be at the gates for you. So now you see what makes a Mother It's the feeling in your heart. It's the love you had so much of, Right from the very start. Though some on earth may not realize You are a Mother until their time is done. They'll be up here with Me one day And you know you're the best one! When tomorrow starts without me And I 'm not here to see, If the sun should rise and find your eyes All filled with tears for me. I wish so much you wouldn't cry The way you did today, While thinking of the many things We didn't get to say. I know how much you love me, As much as I love you, And each time you think of me I know you'll miss me too. But when tomorrow starts without me, Please try to understand, That an angel came and called my name and took me by the hand.
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10/04/2006
BEREAVED PARENTS WISH LIST I wish Bailey hadn't died. I wish I had him back. I wish you wouldn't be afraid to speak my child's name. Bailey lived and was very important to me. I need to hear that he was important to you also. If I cry and get emotional when you talk about Bailey, I wish you knew that it isn't because you have hurt me. Bailey's death is the cause of my tears. You have talked about my child and you have allowed me to share my grief. I thank you for both. Being a bereaved parent is not contagious, so I wish you wouldn't shy away from me. I need you now more than ever. I need diversions, so I do want to hear about you, but I also want you to hear about me. I might be sad and I might cry, but I wish you would let me talk about Bailey; my favorite topic of the day. I know that you think of and pray for me often. I also know that my Bailey's death pains you too. I wish you would let me know these things through a phone call, a card or note, or a real big hug. I wish you wouldn't expect my grief to be over. These first years are traumatic for me, but I wish you could understand that my grief will never be over. I will suffer the death of Bailey until the day I die. I am working hard in my recovery, but I wish you could understand that I will never fully recover. I will always miss Bailey and I will always grieve that he is dead. I wish you wouldn't expect me "not to think about it" or "be happy". Neither will happen for a very long time, so don't frustrate yourself. I don't want to have a "Pity party", but I do wish you would let me grieve. I must hurt before I can heal. I wish you understood how my life has shattered. I know it is miserable for you to be around me when I'm feeling miserable. Please be as patient with me as I am with you. When I say, "I'm doing okay", I wish you could understand that I don't "feel" okay and that I struggle daily. I wish you knew that all of the grief reactions I'm having are very normal. Depression, anger, hopelessness and overwhelming sadness are all to be expected. So please excuse me when I'm quiet and withdrawn or irritable and cranky. Your advice to "take it one day at a time" is excellent advice. However, a day is too much and too fast for me right now. I wish you could understand that I'm doing good to handle an hour at a time. Please excuse me if I seem rude, certainly not my intent. Sometimes the world around me goes too fast and I need to get off. When I walk away, I wish you would let me find a quiet place to spend time alone. I wish you understood that grief changes people. When Bailey died, a big part of me died with him. I am not the same person I was before Bailey died and I will never be that person again. I wish very much that you could understand ~ understand my loss and my grief. But, I pray daily that you will never understand.
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